Things of interest to me and possibly only me:

-After Crary's (Mark) second strikeout, CJ yelled at him for standing so close to the plate (Crary is 6 ft 4 in.). In his next two AB, Crary (Mark) doubled and homered.

-This was a delightful romp in the park for Non-Jerks and Brian as they delivered an ass-whooping not seen since the U.S.' decidedly lopsided victory over the British in the Battle of New Orleans.

-As a lifetime, born and bred, member of Team Jerks, I feel I can say fuck you all.

-This game was dedicated to the loving memory of Michael R. Fusilli (1983-2010). We can take solace in that face that he died doing what he loved most: cursing and calling Alejandro gay in several languages. He will be missed.

-An honorary moment of silence was had before the game. No one cursed for roughly 3 seconds. Yes, even Alejandro.

-Alejandro wore a black thong as he was still in mourning over Mike.

-This game marked the league debut of Crary. We now have three tall, lanky white guys! In an impressive debut, he went 3-5 with 3 extra-base hits including a very Crary-esque homerun. (Roger's handwriting is so poor that "Mark" seemed to actually read as "Crary".)

-Crary in no way resembles Mark Rubin who disappeared shortly before the game. The May 1st game will be played in HIS memory!

-Pepe made the MOST BALLIN' ASS PLAY EVAH! Stephan hit the ball into the hole between 1B and 2B. Pepe ranged to his left, hit Up-Up-Down-Down-Left-Right-Left-Right-B-A-Start, fielded the ball and, with his Pepementum taking him that way, performed a mesmerizing POWER (spin) MOVE and fired to first getting the runner out. Seriously, it was crazy good.

-Both teams struck out 14 times. Unfortunately, clutch hitting seemed to elude the Jerks as they went 4-16, 8 strikeouts and 2 hbp with Runners in Scoring Position while Non-Jerks & Brian went 13 for 26, 6 walks and a hbp with RISP.

-Christos transformed into Mega-Jerk as the game progressed, undermining the confidence of his teammates and everyone around him. Those who have known him longest concede that this phenomenon is known as "Christos being Christos."

-That said, Mega-Jerk somehow inspired Team Jerks to score 7 of its 8 runs in the latter half of the game.

-Seemingly inspired by his own Mega-Jerk powers, Christos made an awesome play in the 7th inning. I couldn't quite see it through the cloud of Mega-Jerkiness, but people tell me it was excellent.

-While Jerks had the more spectacular plays, they seemingly could not make the basic plays resulting in at least 9 errors. In stark contrast, NJ&B only made 3 fielding miscues.

-Brian was cool enough to bring a new iPod deck to play some tunes.

-The Elias Sports Bureau reports that this is the first incident of Brian being cool since the time he suffered frostbite in the Blizzard of '03.

-Newbies Ricky and Chun continue to tear up the league, dominating in almost every facet of the game. Imagine the damage they could do if they showed up on time and were in the middle of the lineup.

-Wilson is still chasing line drives at Cunningham.

-In related news, this was the first multi-homer game in our league since we started playing at Cunningham Park.

-If someone wants to fact check that last tidbit at http://peckparkleague.blogspot.com , then feel free.

-Alvin brought his 7 sons and daughters to the game, you guys! It was cool until one of his tard daughters stood in right field for a period of time. Wrap it up, Yellow Knight, wrap it up.

-CJ showed up at one point, giving Team Jerks hope that they would be able to overcome their deficit. Much like a True Jerk (tm) would, however, he quickly dashed those hopes when he announced that he would not be playing.

-This game also marked the return of Adam Adamsonsonsonsonsonsonson. While Alejandro may have brought the noise, Adam and Pepe brought the news.

-WHAT THE FUCK KINDA WENDY'S RUNS OUT OF BLUE CHEESE?!?!?!

-In an example ultimate benevolence, Wilson was about to give a toy piano to a little kid at the SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE FUCK KINDA WENDY'S RUNS OUT OF BLUE CHEESE WHEN THEY'RE ADVERTISING THE BACON AND BLUE?!?!?!

-...but the stupid kid wouldn't shut the fuck up, so he missed out on a sweet toy piano. Dick.

-Christos also had a ridiculously awesome mustache. He had to leave early, however, to "attend a Burt Reynolds fan club meeting."

-Christos is being considered to star in the remake of 'Mr. Baseball.'

-Christos is also being considered to star in the remake of Magnum P.I. In this remake, however, P.I. would stand for Plakass Intensive and Magnum would be the size of the condom he requires for intercourse with your mother.

-At one point, I passed Christos on the mound but was confused because he had already been pulled from the game. I then realized it was Jose with a comb under his nose.

-Christos does not charge for mustache rides. People pay him for the pleasure.

-In case of an emergency, Christos' mustache can be used as a flotation device.